Novemver 22, 2020: Bobby Russ
Today was 4 months. Honestly, it has felt like it has been years since she was taken from us. It's really odd, but that's 2020 for us. Sometimes I find that I talk to her and explain the crazy things that are going on. For example, once again we are having to limit paper products. It's like March madness with a little Thanksgiving thrown in. I know what she would say too. We are "living the dream". lol
Renee always tried to make things into positive if she could. She struggled at times with her own feelings (as many of us do). However, she would set them to the side to focus on helping others. She did that often when it came to her children. No mother is perfect, but Renee seemed to always try to find a balance between her kids and helping them through things.
No matter when the phone, messenger, or other method rang, she would listen. Granted there were times she was very honest and told them that she was sleeping and ask them to text first. However, she would listen to them either individually or at the same time in different threads. Her hope was that her daughters would eventually grow closer together over time.
She cherished every time she got to spend time with either one of them. I could tell you so many stories about how she enjoyed talking about them. She would tell me updates about them later so proud of different accomplishments. She would tell me about frustrations and her hopes. I got to witness the trials she went through at times to try to help them both as she could.
In the end, I know she is proud of things they have accomplished as most mothers are. I can remember her telling me how much she loved both of them. So, today, on the eve of the 4th month since the tragedy, I am sharing pictures that she had on her phone of her daughters.
I know if she was still here she would want them to know that she loves them both. She will always be a part of their lives (as she is in mine) and that they should spread their wings and fly. Heather Hall and Hall Alexandra Paige, I raise a glass to you ladies. You two will carry on a legacy that is your mother in each your own way. Know that she treasured you and there are many happy memories she shared with me.
I miss talking to her especially right now. Things are so crazy at work it would be fantastic to have her ear.
I miss her. I need her advice right now. Like sandy said we need her listening ear right now. She was the best at listening and trying to help.