November 11, 2020: Bobby Russ
It's amazing to think about time. In many ways, we tend to think of it as very linear. Past, Present, future. This moment... and it's gone. Some have theorized that there isn't really a future until it is a present. Does something exist if you are only hoping for it? Does it only become real once you are living in it.
Then, it's memories. They can feel so vivid at times. They can run through our minds almost on their own choice. Happiness, sadness running through. Life is very complicated. We plan, we hope... and time adjusts it. We can either live in the sorrow of the loss of others or choose to cherish their memories.
No matter what happens in my life, Renee Row will always be a part of me. As time slips into the future, there will be people who think of her less and less. It's natural. Life keeps going. People go through their stages of mourning. Here I sit listening to music talking to people talking of the past, the present, and the future.
I can fondly remember her talking about her plans for the house. Dreams that she will never be able to enact, but that's okay. The specifics aren't what was important. She had visions and plans of a future with me. We had worked so hard for this house over a great relationship that I will cherish to the day I die.
One such memory that I love is how we talked about the garden and the pond we wanted to have. We have always had plants or a mini-garden in our backyard. It was us.... a blending of some of my hopes and dreams with hers. As many of you know, I love butterflies and butterfly plants were always a part of this vision. She had a great way of combining things to make them vital to people.
I remember her sitting on our lanai several nights just talking about plans with the backyard. She wanted various plants over time and I
bought them for her. It made her happy. I loved seeing her smile. That's the past of life. A partnership where both are helping each
other. So, I can say... thank you Renee for that.